Tuesday, October 31, 2006

The Dream Distiller

Tulips cast in pewter shake
On a mantle thick with dust.
Mortars have the rooftop quake.
Curtains tickled, hands relieve
Lonely skin glued to cold sheets
By the juice of orchid's pearl.

Hungry fingers trace the germ;
Map the theatres page by page
Til the fruit of labour won
Nails the flush and coats the thumb.
Resin wrought in solitude
Clams to amber, thought intact,
Like mosquitoes can get trapped.
I'll be that.

The Nihilist's Lament

Suffering is no more fun than not suffering.
All is made none.
"Mother, may I climb back into your womb?" he cried.
All is made none.
Breath goes stale, body weak, as the mind aborts.
All is made none.
Shelter me under your gaze where the world can't hurt.
All is made none.
God, and drugs and damaged sex map his rash protests.
All is made none,
Give me space where I might blossom when my body's gone.
All is made none.
Rough liasons gave him a junkie appetite.
All is made none.
I beg erasure by the weight of your desperate truth.
All is made none.
Pound him into ash and grime long before the time when
All is made none.
He lubricates his flagging will with a God mascot.
All is made none.
I am more opaque than God. I have flesh, so what?
All is made none.
Father may I sever me from your legacy?
All is made none.
He raced his shadow into sands of oblivion.
All is made none.
Extricate me from the anchorage of history.
All is made none.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Alienation:

All the
world's
a
stage
but
you
can't
ignore
the fourth wall.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Black Carnations

A carcass slung by the roadside.
The moon beaming junk into
Minds, scrambled by loneliness.
Break the cycle.

A black carnation will blossom
Where hunger expires; mark the
Grave of lust with poisoned fruit.
Wake the passion.

When apathy casts my heart
In grey light I pray that
Fire can reignite my will to fight.

My bed a vault of neurosis;
A desert of faith, tripping out,
Disjointed, night upon night.
Kick the habit.

While perverts better-adjusted
Pose with their wives for the
Kodak covenant to life in chains.
Drink to comfort.

When chaos aborts my focus
On progress I hope this
Will can overcome that which is numb.

My catatonic compulsions
Reject every spark so I'm left to
Reason myself out of life.
Final reductions.

Perhaps I'm merely post-human;
A kink in the soul makes me think
That I've evolved too far.
Of course, I'm kidding.

When bleakness engulfs me, out
Comes the gallows wit.
When Puck cannot be fucked I'll give it up.

I'm not opting out.
Too much to say.
There's too much to shout
To end the day.

Excerpt From "The Ghosting"

"If it weren't for land
I would hold your hand
Through the chasmic gloom
Of the padded room
Where your head abides,
Where the ruin glides
Through the slalom hell
Of your darkest spells..."

Naturally there's more. See '"..."

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Under The Mill

Chymical Wedding of SigilHex Action

I went to a wedding,
The chemical kind.
Spent the afternoon shedding
The weight on my mind.
And a fusion occurred
Between sigil and hex.
The latter directed to death
And the former to sex.
I left the wake at one.
With a scheme I move on
To The Mill where I dream
By the whispering will.

Th Active Male.

And I harness the wind;
Have it lashed to my heels.
I take flight on a cloud;
Contemplate what I've found;
Visualise a retreat:
I can anchor my feet
In the woods by the sea;
They're familiarity
Like I've never yet known.
I can manifest love
In the shape of a boy
Who turns scraps of deadwood
Into toys.

The nuptial begun;
I have Eden invoked;
The rest be undone.
Hexes fires I've stoked.
The sigil: the groom,
The hex is the wife;
The passive meets gloom
And the active finds life.

The Passive Female

The water wheel groans.
I awake; forest fires
Have made themselves known
And assembled a pyre
Where my star gets to blaze
Under Columbine's gaze
While Harlequin plays
With Pierrot's malaise;
In black cap, army belt,
Camo pants and Converse,
I'm invoking the sprite
Who will pilot your hearse:
Eric Harris reborn,
In the guise of a faun,
Scatters seeds on the ground;
Shuts the whole system down.
He will buckle foundations
And topple proud nations
While you bandage your sin
In somnambulist skin;
Home improvement instead
Of forging gold from lead.
I begin to intone:
That when next you're alone,
May the wolf wreck your dawn.
May the plague blight your corn.
May my trumpeted scorn
Bring a legion of fauns
To your door,
With napalm and quicklime;
Take their sweet little time
Pissing blades in your face,
Spitting gallons of mace,
Though you can't get more blind
Than the worst of your kind
Which is you
Prima-donna young slut.
What an honour to shut
The door fast on your soul,
To condemn you to coals
Of your making;
You couldn't stop faking a heart
So I ripped you apart
To expose all the rot,
To reveal what an absence you've got
Where compassion should dwell.
May you languish in hell.
There's a hex in the shell
Of this song, can you tell?
I invoke Columbine
To set wolves to your swine;
When a wolf dressed as faun
Makes your home quake at dawn,
Eric Harris my pawn, is in place,
To engender your fall
While the whispering wheel scores it all.

The Passionate Union of Opposites

The marriage complete,
The fusion be blessed.
The sigil may sweep in his arms,
Plant a kiss on the hex.
While the scorned whither fast,
Under gilded pink tongue
And blessed lips I will last
Evermore in the place I belong.

I'll hide out in The Mill,
In my forest idyll.
I'll be harvesting seeds
To attend to my needs
As and when they appear:
Hate, love, peace, war and tears
Of pain, sorrow and joy.
I'm caressed by the boy
Who has carpenter's hands.
He grew out of a seed
In the fertile green land
Of my heart's purest needs.
And we live in The Mill
Writing songs, building hexes,
And the glory of sex is
Eternal and free.

Very soon I'll be there
In my carpenter's arms
And the sky will melt down
As I swallow his charms,
And the picture is made;
Talisman in the shade.
I will charge it with will
And move in the for the kill,
So my heart will be filled
When I get to The Mill.

Bread and Wine

Quarter past four
When fifteen follows sixteen
Seconds freeze:
Fever dream.
And a photograph is born

Depicting scenes
Of a family round a table
Switching dreams
For a disease
Which through one of them has torn.

Breaking bread is dead.

You're a legacy of opinion
To a five-year old red indian
On the knee of a dying aunt.
She says 'cancer' I say 'can't'.

She says 'a ghost
Is nothing but a memory,
Don't forget: I'll stick around'
And she hasn't vanished yet.

When paper burns
The picture turns to ash
And becomes thought,
So I was taught
And the same applies to death.

Raising dead like bread.

You're the public face of an angel.
Whenever I feel un-sage I'll
Summon to thought my aunt
Who says 'can' when I say 'can't'.

Breaking bread and wine.
On memories we dine.

Quarter past four
When fifteen follows sixteen
Moments wait
To come awake
By a well-tuned radio.

The static hangs
Like cicadas in
B-Movie sound design.
I'm by a lake.
I can't watch the lady go.

Baking bread with dad.

You're the drizzle behind his eyes.
The salt in our dough's a surprise.
I say 'tell me about my aunt'.
I say 'cancer?' He says 'can't'.

Breaking bread and wine.
On memories we dine.

Renegade Waves

I won't open my veins in the bath for you
But in theory I would,
I won't blow out my veins if you asked me to.
Rest assured that I could.
I won't squeal with delight when we meet again
But know that inside, you have helped me to ride all the...

...Renegade waves
In my heart
And I love...

I won't scream myself dumb til I fall asleep
Not like I used to.
I won't claw at the walls as the visions creep.
The crap I'd put you through.
I won't cuddle you up til you suffocate
But know that I could, and I feel that I should as the...

...Renegade waves
Are made still
And I love...

I will polish your grave if you get there first
Not that you will.
I will promise to save you from the very worst.
Apathy kills.
I will smile whenever I linger upon your grace.
You stifle the pain.
I will blossom whenever you show your face
As sun through the rain.
And I'm happy again as the...

...Renegade waves are mute
By your beauty.
I love you.