The Gut Chronicles: Part One: Open Letter; Close Friend.
Hey,
Tonight, my gut's mostly trembling with tension at this frustrating situation. And I don't know why. I honestly think we're talking ourselves into bullshit psychodrama, amping up the paranoia unnecessarily. The only thing we're conceivably doing wrong is being cowardly. And I'm not gonna get a hernia through cowardice. Yeh, it's hard, and awkward at times, but I really think we can afford to chill out more in public. This isn't Victorian England, and two guys being affectionate in public, while it may turn some eyes, is far from the most controversial scene on the streets today. I'm not gonna freak out and live under a self-imposed regime of fear because somebody might resent who I happen to like a lot. I'm not gonna nurse a broken heart and call everything off just because some people are narrow-minded, cynical, presumptuous, intolerant assholes. I don't mean your parents there. Just bigoted, middle-england. Your parents, they have a point: yeh, you're younger than me. And...even if we were having sex, it'd be totally legal, and if the law dictates what's right and wrong in this country then great, I have a clear conscience, and I'd still have a clear conscience even if we were. In some countries, chewing gum on the streets is socially taboo, but people still do it. We're hurting nobody but ourselves, by freaking out over something so simple and basically innocent. I like you, you like me, we're not especially public in our affections, and frankly, it's nobody else's business. if your parents find out, what can they do? Stop us seeing each other? I gather that's already the situation anyway. It can't exactly get any more difficult than it is. So, why not let me meet them and discuss it civilly? We're all reasonable human beings with pure intentions so I fail to see why some sort of arrangement cannot be achieved. We should be really happy together, and a lot of the time we are. We should be carefree and making the most of our time together. Your parents sound like decent folks, but they've gotta let go at some point, they can't suffocate you forever. And you shouldn't have to answer to them on every issue. If you were five, yeh. But now you're basically old enough to smoke, get married, have sex, get on with your life. I understand it can get oppressive and horrible if they're on your case all of the time, but it sounds like they're overly paranoid about you, to the point that it could really fuck you up emotionally if they don't mellow before long. It also hurts that I'm being painted as some sort of lecherous, agenda-driven villain by someone who hasn't even requested that they meet me. That could be a real blow to someone's self-esteem. I know you can be strong, because I see an angry, resilient, complex guy in you (as well as funny, intelligent, great company, spirited friend), and it seems like the only area of your life in which you're not defiant is in dealing with your parents. I don't wanna participate in the causing of a rift between you and them, but I don't wanna see their over-cautious attitudes grind all the spirit out of you either, over something which should be perfect. All we're doing is loving each other's company, hugging, kissing, laughing and enjoying our closeness, and if that becomes a sin then I'm fucking off to live in a cave until society crumbles. If you wanted the relationship to incorporate sex at any point, I'd be more than happy to wait until a time where it would be deemed appropriate by those concerned. I'm in no urgent rush to 'land you in bed'. I love your company, and I hate the fact that about 50% of our time together is poisoned with worry and angst over something so, well, human. (the other 50% is frequently blissful and hilarious.) We could obliterate sex from the equation altogether and it wouldn't bother me, if it meant that we got to spend time with each other openly and without fear of being scrutinised and condemned. I very rarely invest emotionally in anyone, and when I do it;s because my gut says, wow, this is amazing and worthwhile. I invest rarely because I'm wary of being heartbroken if things nosedive, so there has to be a good chance that the risk is worth taking, and with us, the highs seriously outweigh the lows.
So, nice weather we're having today. Yeah, the meal was lovely, geat company, great food, fine music and all for £30. And nobody was hurt.
Ok, over to you,
Get back to me soon before my innards haemorrhage, ok?
Tonight, my gut's mostly trembling with tension at this frustrating situation. And I don't know why. I honestly think we're talking ourselves into bullshit psychodrama, amping up the paranoia unnecessarily. The only thing we're conceivably doing wrong is being cowardly. And I'm not gonna get a hernia through cowardice. Yeh, it's hard, and awkward at times, but I really think we can afford to chill out more in public. This isn't Victorian England, and two guys being affectionate in public, while it may turn some eyes, is far from the most controversial scene on the streets today. I'm not gonna freak out and live under a self-imposed regime of fear because somebody might resent who I happen to like a lot. I'm not gonna nurse a broken heart and call everything off just because some people are narrow-minded, cynical, presumptuous, intolerant assholes. I don't mean your parents there. Just bigoted, middle-england. Your parents, they have a point: yeh, you're younger than me. And...even if we were having sex, it'd be totally legal, and if the law dictates what's right and wrong in this country then great, I have a clear conscience, and I'd still have a clear conscience even if we were. In some countries, chewing gum on the streets is socially taboo, but people still do it. We're hurting nobody but ourselves, by freaking out over something so simple and basically innocent. I like you, you like me, we're not especially public in our affections, and frankly, it's nobody else's business. if your parents find out, what can they do? Stop us seeing each other? I gather that's already the situation anyway. It can't exactly get any more difficult than it is. So, why not let me meet them and discuss it civilly? We're all reasonable human beings with pure intentions so I fail to see why some sort of arrangement cannot be achieved. We should be really happy together, and a lot of the time we are. We should be carefree and making the most of our time together. Your parents sound like decent folks, but they've gotta let go at some point, they can't suffocate you forever. And you shouldn't have to answer to them on every issue. If you were five, yeh. But now you're basically old enough to smoke, get married, have sex, get on with your life. I understand it can get oppressive and horrible if they're on your case all of the time, but it sounds like they're overly paranoid about you, to the point that it could really fuck you up emotionally if they don't mellow before long. It also hurts that I'm being painted as some sort of lecherous, agenda-driven villain by someone who hasn't even requested that they meet me. That could be a real blow to someone's self-esteem. I know you can be strong, because I see an angry, resilient, complex guy in you (as well as funny, intelligent, great company, spirited friend), and it seems like the only area of your life in which you're not defiant is in dealing with your parents. I don't wanna participate in the causing of a rift between you and them, but I don't wanna see their over-cautious attitudes grind all the spirit out of you either, over something which should be perfect. All we're doing is loving each other's company, hugging, kissing, laughing and enjoying our closeness, and if that becomes a sin then I'm fucking off to live in a cave until society crumbles. If you wanted the relationship to incorporate sex at any point, I'd be more than happy to wait until a time where it would be deemed appropriate by those concerned. I'm in no urgent rush to 'land you in bed'. I love your company, and I hate the fact that about 50% of our time together is poisoned with worry and angst over something so, well, human. (the other 50% is frequently blissful and hilarious.) We could obliterate sex from the equation altogether and it wouldn't bother me, if it meant that we got to spend time with each other openly and without fear of being scrutinised and condemned. I very rarely invest emotionally in anyone, and when I do it;s because my gut says, wow, this is amazing and worthwhile. I invest rarely because I'm wary of being heartbroken if things nosedive, so there has to be a good chance that the risk is worth taking, and with us, the highs seriously outweigh the lows.
So, nice weather we're having today. Yeah, the meal was lovely, geat company, great food, fine music and all for £30. And nobody was hurt.
Ok, over to you,
Get back to me soon before my innards haemorrhage, ok?
posted by Nick Hudson at 1:44 AM
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